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Archive for September, 2006

A Man of Integrity

Several years ago I picked up a cheapo sweatshirt for my husband’s birthday. The quality was poor, to be sure. But I had to get it because of what was printed on it. It was a Promise Keepers shirt stating “Man of his word – Man of The Word.” That is my husband.

When I think back on high school and early college, I realize that I dated some real jerks. The kind you wonder “what on earth did I ever see in him!!??” or even “How did I survive dating that guy?” Now, there were a couple good guys that I truly hope found their soul-mate. And, who knows, maybe even the jerks grew up and got a clue that the world didn’t revolve around them. But I feel truly blessed to have wound up with my G. At times I marvel over it.

Now, he’s not perfect, and I could come up with a list of things that bug me pretty quick. Aah, but I’m sure he could make his own list regarding me, just as quick, if not quicker. 🙂 But, we choose not to dwell on those things. None of us is perfect – we all have our sin struggles. And there’s so much in him that I appreciate and am thankful for:

  • Integrity
  • Thoughtfulness
  • Kindness
  • Compassion
  • A Gentleman
  • Love
  • Fun
  • Friendliness
  • Godliness
  • A Leader
  • A Great Dad

I could probably come up with many more words for the above list, but you get the idea. Let me give you an example of my husband’s heart. This past Sunday while I was cooking dinner, he was watching TV. I had no idea what he was watching until I went to tell him dinner was ready. I found him all excited and emotional over one of those Extreme Home Makeover shows with Ty Pennington. They built a home for this huge family that had homeschooled in their tiny house. The kids were just beside themselves over their new house and expressed so much gratitude to the team, and to their mom. You just had to see it; I was sorry I had missed most of the episode. G literally had tears in his eyes watching this show. We left dinner on the table and finished the show together.

Now, my big tough soldier guy probably won’t appreciate me sharing that. But that’s one of those times when I see a glimpse of his heart and how much he cares for people. I see it in his eyes as he watches B, too. He loves being a dad. I consider myself blessed to be among those he cares for the most. I am thankful God made him. I’m glad he is who he is. And I’m blessed that he is my husband.

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Happy Birthday Dear Hubby

Not much time today – must get hopping on a birthday cake for G. Happy Birthday to you!!!

It’s unfortunate that his birthday fell on Wednesday this year as it seems that is when all the things we participate in are happening. I have a Spanish class – which I skipped today as B has been under the weather. But he seems to be recovered enough to go on to soccer practice this evening. Then we have our church fellowship group. Whew! I’ll take the birthday cake to share with everyone there.

Poor G also had a PT (physical training) test today – which he passed! Whoo hoo! This one was a biggy because staying on at the academy depended on it. I believe that folks do get a second chance at it. But if you flunk that – you’re outta there. Some of the guys have really stressed over it, so I’m sure they’re glad it’s over.

This weekend we will celebrate more along with my dad and step-mom – whose birthdays are also approaching. So it will be birthday weekend here. I’ve been thinking of all the things I love and appreciate about my husband. Perhaps I’ll take some time later this week to write it down. For now, I’m off to bake that cake.

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I seem to have some sort of writer’s block. I’ve had many things cross my mind that I thought I should write here, but the fingers never got moving on the keyboard.

I also have a time issue. B is working on dropping his naps – oh no! Some days he naps, others he doesn’t. That has really thrown my afternoons off. I’m about to let him get up as it’s nearly 2 and he’s nowhere near falling asleep. And he had seemed so tired before. Alas, he was quiet and still for awhile. Maybe that’s all he needed.

But, I can’t count on it either way. It seems if I plan to skip the nap and run errands or attend an event – he crashes late afternoon or early evening. Then we have issues with bedtime. But if I’m counting on him having a nap – he’s likely to get squirly on me and do anything but rest. I guess this is just one of those bumpy stages.

But, hey, our morning school time is going great! I seem to have lost the picture Bible we were using, so am reading the stories from his Precious Moments NKJ Bible – a gift to him from J (first-mom). The picture Bible does a better job of grabbing his attention with a picture for each story. But he’s doing OK with the regular Bible.

Oh, I finaly got a letter off to J. I had been meaning to send her a note since we’ve moved. She knew we were moving, but I wanted to let her know the move went well and we were getting settled, all that. I also finally wrote some thank-you notes that were way overdue. Just need to get those addressed and mailed. I just seem to be dragging lately.

Well, that’s probably more than enough aimless rambling. B is getting noisy so I’d better go end rest-time and get him involved in something.

He just came out and tackled me with a big hug. 🙂

ADDED NOTE: I found the picture Bible! It got stashed in the wrong spot when I was clearing for company. Bad habit of mine. 🙂

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I had seen this post a few days ago on Theologica and went back today to look at it more thoroughly. These Scripture memory songs are upbeat and contemporary, to be enjoyed by the whole family. So, I thought I’d share it here for any parents or individuals concerned about helping yourselves and your little ones to hide God’s word in your hearts. I am going to put this on my Christmas list, to be sure. 🙂

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Potty Training Update

Things have been going much better in the potty department. After the incident I last posted about on the subject, B realized that pooping in his pants was more trouble than it’s worth. He does still prefer to go in a pull-up at naptime or bedtime. So, we’re still keeping wipes around. But he makes sure to use the potty any other time. Yay! Accidents in general are becoming few and far between. However, that independance he had gained before we moved is still lacking. He runs to wherever I or dad are proclaiming the need to go pee pee, and won’t head to the bathroom until someone accompanies him. When we refuse to go with him, we generally wind up with a puddle to clean up. But, since he had been able to go independantly before, I am confident he will again – when he’s ready. With all the upheaval of moving, it could be so much worse, so no complaints. I just hope he has it down before the next move. 🙂

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Well, I have gone and done it. As if I didn’t have enought to do already, I have started another blog. So, if you’re into food, health, nutrition, and such, check it out:

Eat Well, Live Well

Every so often I have something on my mind, but don’t write about it because it seems beyond the scope of this blog. So, having a second blog should just about cover it. 🙂 Now, for a few more hours in the day to get to it all!

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An Inkling

I’ll start with a definition of “inkling”: a slight knowledge or vague notion.

Basically, I got a clue. “About what?” you ask. In many entries on this blog I have mentioned and linked to other blogs regarding the perspectives and feelings of first parents and adoptees. Those folks have opened my eyes and educated me on some of the negative aspects of adoption. Obviously the words they have spoken have given me a certain level of understanding, but not on a personal level (beyond being an adoptive parent concerned about B’s first-mom). Through my experience with my own family this past weekend I was able to make a connection and, ever so slightly, understand on a more personal level what these folks are talking about.

I have mentioned before that my parents are divorced. My grandmother that had the birthday is my dad’s mother. It was a great party, by the way, lots of fun. I’m glad I was able to attend and see everyone. But there was one small part of the party that caused a gamut of emotions for me. My uncle put together a slide presentation of my grandmother’s life: early years, her marriage, children, their marriages, grand children, great grandchildren, etc. It was beautiful, really. He did a great job. However, there was one person edited out of the family history. You guessed it – my mother.

The question did cross my mind while I was looking for the requested photographs, “should I send any pictures that have my mother in them?” So, I guess I pretty much expected that she might be left out. Although I can’t say it was all bad, she and my grandmother did have a rather rocky relationship. But, my mother was a part of this family and part of my grandmother’s life for nearly 30 years. And, here’s the kicker, if not for her, there wouldn’t be me or my brother. So, viewing this “life in review” minus my mother was somewhat painful.

Now, I’m not trying to fault my family for this exclusion. I’m sure they have their reasons. I’m simply writing here about the leap my mind made to adoption issues while processing the resulting emotions. It seemed to me that a glimmer of light was shed on the subject and my understanding of how it feels to be on another side of the triad deepened, just a little bit. I think I understand just a tiny bit more than I did before the anger, sadness, grief, and many emotions that can’t even be put to words.

I keep qualifying my statements with “little bit” or “tiny bit” in an effort to express that I’m not equating my experience here with what first parents or adoptees experience. I’m sure they are not even in the same league. The depth of the loss is likely beyond my ability to imagine. But something about this past weekend clicked in my brain an inkling of understanding I did not have before. So, I have feebly attempted to express it here.

It seems there is this sense of being “edited out” or having someone important to your life “edited out” by adoptive families and society in general. This even to the point of having a new birth certificate issued that names the adoptive parents – with no mention of the folks truely responsible for bringing said child into the world. Intentions aside, that’s got to hurt. I think it is important that we realize that and acknowledge it. I don’t know how to change it, or if it is even possible to change it in this fallen world. But it does seem a good first step.

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